Our family dog passed away recently. In a profound turn - he left us with a lesson to hold onto forever.
Sacrifices from SNL, quotes from the latest Netflix hit, and a puppy we will love and have in our hearts until the end of time. Love you buddy
What if the true test of family isn’t loyalty, but is sacrifice?
In the hit Netflix series of “Your Honor,” Bryan Cranston said this in one of the scenes while talking to James “Jimmy” Baxter, mob boss and head honcho of organized crime in New Orleans. It was a visceral moment that aligned both characters who had experienced the loss of their sons and a whole gambit of adversity. In the end, bringing them together for their new grand-son. In a strange turn of events, they became close. From adversaries to allies, the show will keep you on your toes.
Maybe even your tippy toes.
I seldom feel I’ve heard something that I haven’t heard already and rarely resonate with the word vomit out of peoples mouths. It’s the cynic in me, what can I say? I get it from my momma. I’m a skeptic and you should be skeptical of how we receive the world when it’s right in front of us. It’s all for commerce and over saturated. It’s like, does anyone just do it because thats who they are anymore? There’s to many unanswered questions around motive for me. It’s not as simple as picking a rose off a rose bush and pricking your finger and moving on. It’s like picking a rose off a bush and it consumes your whole god damn body.
We loved Sean Penn because he was just a cool dude doing his own thing during “Fast Times at Ridgemont High.” Heath Ledger was iconic and a legend in his own right, but zero regard for the world around him. He locked himself away preparing for his famous role in “The Dark Knight.” The goal was to be the best. The infamous Robert Downey Junior played roles as “Iron Man,” amongst others, and excelled by doubling down on his investment to himself. His earlier works, some of which were some pretty terrible SNL skits, he would regard as transformative and life changing.
"I learned so much in that year about what I wasn't," Downey said during an interview in “Men’s Journal.” about the 11th season of SNL.
Downey joined the Lorne Michaels 11th season comeback on SNL which turned out to be a transformative year for all of the creators, producers, writers, and set crew. It was also the season that was saved in the 11th hour before NBC executives nearly cancelled the series. Imagine a world without the genius behind SNL? I can’t honestly.
NBC’s Peacock had done a documentary series on SNL and even did a whole episode on the “More Cowbell” skit with Christopher Walken. If you don’t know what I’m referring to, you can just stop reading and go watch that. I understand. During interviews Will Ferrel who originally wrote the sketch said he was criticized for “being too annoying.”
In true Will Ferrel fashion he recounted “If you think I’m annoying now, you haven’t seen nothing yet. I’m gonna be even more annoying”
It was an enlightening and encouraging documentary that NBC’s Peacock put together of the trials and tribulations of SNL and the impact it had on today’s most infamous comics, actors, writers, and producers. The entertainment industry isn’t for the faint of heart and everyday you have to prove yourself. You have to dig deeper into your soul and squeeze every drip of juice out. Usually leaving you rendered useless slumped acorss an office couch pleading for a break. Heavy lies the crown? Yeah whatever.
It’s the pinnacle of freedom for a creator to tap into that unfounded fountain of rebellion. (That one is mine, all rights reserved ya filthy thieves, just playin)
The one constant I see with musicians, creators of all kinds, comics, writers, singers, doesn’t matter what. It’s that you have an undying thirst that you cannot quench.
I had a long ride with my mom today after we spent some time reminiscing over the loss of our family dog, Gator. It’s been a rough week, maybe one of the hardest weeks of my professional career and personal development. I laid off the reefer awhile back in an active attempt to recommit to my creative projects and pursuits. I honestly just wanted to do better and knew I could. I felt this was holding me back and didn’t give it too much thought once I realized it was cock blocking me from elevating myself. Ever since then I keep having these vivid, almost final destination type night terrors.
Damn you Tucker Carlson for saying “Get off the shit.” It’s crystalized into my cranium because it was off the cuff, but it hit home. It was exactly what I needed when I needed it. Not sure what interview was now but go look for it. Maybe itll serve as your kick in the butt too.
It triggered me because I saw great artists and comics everywhere. Social media, at the NYC clubs I would perform at, random Elks Lodges or back alleys I had performed stand up throughout NJ. I wanted to be great more than anything, and I wanted to do anything that would open the next door for me. I wasn’t willing to keep spending my days suffocating one of the things that was holding me back. Every so often I think of doing a couple BR’s (bong rips) to level myself and I just picture Carlsons fucking hyena laugh in my head. Imagine sky diving and never pulling the chute, that’s what that laugh will do to a person. It’ll have you free falling forever.
As if that wasn’t enough letting go of the one thing that helps me unwind after a long fuck-filled day, I had to start working at my craft. With any creative endeavors, we spend so much time contemplating what our next move is without any action behind our well intended thoughts. Everything is where it needs to be but were stuck.
Can I do it?
What if I fail? Theres so many promises I made to myself. How can I turn my back on that?
Will people think I’m a joke?
Why does everyone to be better than me?
Our thoughts are detail focused. We zero in on all the things that could go wrong. Were not focusing on “How can I complete this task?” It takes us away from the doing, the “lights, camera, action!” moment. Something Gator never thought of. He just loved endlessly like a good lil puppy. Look at project managers. They are the best at taking the idea and point of conception and bringing it into fruition.
I wanted to write something to pay homage to our late family dog. He was originally named Cookie, and even picked up a few other names along the way. Nevertheless, he and all of our pets are our family. They live to serve us, they live to give us purpose.
I would walks into my moms house yelling “Gadddiiiiiiiii” and his little tail would wag like a crazy propeller priming for take off.
All systems go, check check check. Woof. MY FRIENDS ARE HERE@!@!@#
Lets bring this thing home, whatta say Gadi?
This ones for you buddy.
I see what Bryan Cranston meant by his quote “What if the true test of family isn’t loyalty, but sacrifice?”
For a dog who was slowly dying from cancer that has touched so many of us on so many levels in our life, he never made a sound from his pain. He was always happy to see his friends and up to his last days, was the sweetest. Lily and Rem, my dogs loved him and they grew up driving my mom bat shit crazy. It’s been around eight years that my mom brought Gadi home and he immediately became part of the family. He touched us all profoundly.
We don’t deserve the tremendous love that these pets have to offer us. Gator, Rem, and Lily, I know you would stay with me and the family forever if it was your choice. But I accept that you too would give up anything, including yourselves if it meant our lives could go on. It’s not the losing the things I love in life that hurt more than anything, but how will I move on without you? How will life carry on with the void?
Just like Will Ferrel when the critics said he was annoying, he kept going. Even when Robert Downey Junior thought his days were numbered, he found a reason to pull wisdom out of his hat. It gave him the steam to keep going realizing his own deficiencies and evidently went on to become one of the greatest actors in the world.
Did ya get that one Jarvis?
Lorne Michaels was basically shut down by NBC and told this was the end for SNL after season 11. As if the big bang had just taken place in the 11th hour, SNL was saved by Brandon Tartikoff, executive for NBC at the time.
There’s so many incredible and head scratching stories throughout the world, none of which make any fucking sense at all. But most of which peppered with the great sacrifices we have to make and undying motivation to keep getting after it. It was about finding the strength to go on and remain steadfast. It was about writing better, showing up, and or in Gadi’s case, loving us to the very end.
I hope we all learn to love the way he did. His loyalty, and sacrifice similar to the greats of the world, will always have a profound impact on my life.
Love you buddy. I hope they have lots of treat for you in doggie heaven.
Make sure you give them hell you little tail wagging monster.
💙